


We Will Heal Together and Live Forever

by ihave0dignity



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alien Planet, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, Depressed Lance (Voltron), Depression, Good Lotor (Voltron), Healing, Healthy Lance/Lotor (Voltron), I Will Go Down With This Ship, I spoiled it a bit here in the tags so you would know what youre getting into, I tag as I go, Insecure Lance (Voltron), Lance will heal with time and love, M/M, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, Suicidal Lance (Voltron), Suicide Attempt, War, english isn't the author's first language
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-11
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:07:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27515056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ihave0dignity/pseuds/ihave0dignity
Summary: No matter how high he would try to reach out, he knew he could never touch the sky.No matter how loud he would try to scream, he knew he could never have a voice.No matter how fast he would try to run, he knew he could never win the race.No matter how much he wanted to believe, he knew he could never thrive.Lance McClain was helpless, and he knew that if he didn’t do anything about it, he would be miserable for the rest of his life. It was about time it all changed.All in all, he didn’t expect anyone to have faith in someone like him, especially when he was about to do something so petty, but Lotor stood there, and he held him.
Relationships: Lance & Lotor (Voltron), Lance & Lotor's Generals (Voltron), Lance/Lotor (Voltron)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 40





	We Will Heal Together and Live Forever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I hope you're doing well!
> 
> Some things you should know before jumping into this work:  
> I'm writing for fun! I'm my own beta reader, so don't mind a little bit of misspelling.  
> English isn't my first language, too, so sometimes my vocabulary may be weak, but that's alright.  
> I'm also going to talk about heavy topics, such as suicide, depression, anxiety, abuse, violence and others. Be warned!
> 
> Have a happy reading, I hope you enjoy it!

As careless and selfish as Lance may have always portrayed himself to be, he couldn’t remember the last time he had stopped to feel the wind and appreciate the sky as it was, not caring about being attacked all of a sudden, or not disappointing anyone.

His legs flew, up and down, while he sat on the top of the highest rock of the small planet. He had never been there before, but it was astonishingly breathtaking. The green of the wild nature overtook any other color that could be seen. Trees went high up enough to almost reach the clouds, and the lakes’ water were as transparent as it could get.

It was a peaceful place. Few villages built of wood and organic materials, located where originally there was no high grass to begin with. It seemed like the population especially respected the planets’ biodiversity and life.

Lance smiled, maybe he could try to start a new journey there. But almost as fast as the smile appeared, it faded. He knew it would never work out, just as his old and new life did. That was why he was there.

He put a lot of thought into the plan, as one would. Ending your life shouldn’t be a decision you make on the spot, there was a lot of opportunities and potential you’d be leaving behind. Lance knew that.

There was nothing left for him. His family back on Earth thought he was dead, and they were most likely living the best of their life, it had been enough time to get over his loss. As sad as the thought was, he knew it was the truth.

He thought, for a while, that maybe he was needed for Voltron. To win the war. But that wasn’t true. He started to notice and pay more attention to how the team treated him, and it wasn’t at all pretty.

Lance had to admit he maybe didn’t have enough motivation to give his best at trainings and to all the tasks he was assigned to, but depression does that to you. He had tried to ask for meds or to look for a counsellor, but, as always, they didn’t really listen to him.

It didn’t matter the times he tried his all and wore himself out for the team, or the countless occasions where he saved a mission just with a shot of his rifle, or the restless nights he spent on the training room, sweating his worries away. All that was important were the times he failed. The times sadness and sorrow got the best of him, that his insecurities didn’t let him try, or that anxiety shook his soul one too many times.

His efforts to bring the team together and lessen the tension that was always in the air were seen as foolishness. When he would try to make one of them laugh in a moment of agony, they would tell him to stop joking. When he would try to ignore his deep, dark thoughts with a pun, he would be called annoying. When he would try to increase someone’s self-esteem with a compliment or flirt, he would be shushed.

Nothing he did actually mattered.

It was hard to come in terms with the fact that he was all they said he was. But he knew now.

He knew that he was cocky, loud, insecure, careless, bothersome, stupid, and useless. Compared to anyone else in the castle, he was the one who did the less. And he finally accepted that, at last.

The plan had been ready for over a month. It had to be set on a night where neither Keith or Pidge were awake, though, which was the complicated part. But the day had finally arrived, and on that same night, Lance put the note he had written over his bed, put the suit in its place, and kissed Blue one last time.

He wrote apologies for everyone, for being a burden for so long, ruining missions, being a bad paladin, and for stealing one of the small ships. He tried not to be sentimental so they wouldn’t pay much mind to it, but his tears wet and stained the small piece of paper.

As stupid as he was, he didn’t forget to destroy the trackers on the ship he took. He packed a couple fruits and snacks for the trip, for he didn’t know where he was going— he had to at least find a beautiful place for his body to be buried.

He had traveled for almost a week before he found a small, green planet, light years away from what he had once called home. And there he was now, contemplating the green sky, and taking his last breaths of clean air.

Lost in time, Lance didn’t know for how long he stood there, observing small and big animals move through the green so far away, people dance around the waters on a lake not so far from where he sat, and the clouds move, faster than they should, through the sunny sky.

He almost didn’t think weird of the familiar wide, gray and purple ships entering the atmosphere of the planet, until it finally hit him.

Galras.

“Oh, you have to be fucking kidding me!”

He didn’t have time to think, or act, or run, and fighting was nowhere what he had in mind. He didn’t have time to do anything at all. They started blasting in random directions, ruining the planets’ beauty and secrets. For all Lance wanted to be mad, he could only feel sadness.

As he tried to ignore the chaos and destruction that surrounded him, closing his eyes, he was ready to let go of what he was once grateful for. He raised from his feet and looked up, expecting to see a clear, white cloud over him.

Except all that greeted him was the sight of a Galran ship, hovering right over him, and soldiers coming down right at him. Helpless, wearing no armor or bearing no weapon, all he could do was sigh, and take a step back into oblivion.

The last thing he heard was a too familiar voice, shouting at him in rage. “Blue Paladin!”

As though that wasn’t the last thing Lance wanted to experience or hear while alive, barely he knew that it was far away from it.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't have a writing schedule, so the updates may be inconsistent and the chapters' lenght may vary!
> 
> Comment any tags I may add! I want everyone to feel comfortable while reading, so if you have suggestions, please tell me!
> 
> Find me on Instagram: instagram.com/kohionegai
> 
> Thank you for reading. :)


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